ART: In-actionable Intelligence

Actionable Intelligencenoun; information with a practical and relevant application, especially with regards to business or military planning/strategy.

Example: Let’s say you know a guy who works at Apple. He tells you that Apple is about to buy out Samsung which will cause the price of Apple stocks to skyrocket, and you should totally buy Apple stocks right now. This is actionable intelligence. (This is also known as insider trading, which is generally frowned upon by the IRS, but I digress)

When I decided to start this blogging bullshit, I had to come up with a name. Which was really difficult. “Oh but Narrator, just call it ‘Narrator’s blog’ or whatever.” Yes Mark, that’s a fantastic idea. Blunt and straight to the point. It’s also fucking boring. Why do you think Samsung names their phones “Galaxy” something instead of “Phone”? Probably because people don’t expect something named “Phone Note 7” to go supernova in their pocket, but I think I’ve bashed Samsung enough for today.

Point is, I had to come up with an interesting title that pretty much allows me to take this in whichever direction I want. Which is hard. Generic and interesting don’t typically go together. So I started with me. What am I? Well, I’m a college student. Great. That doesn’t help, there are millions of college students. Hmm. What do I know? Not a whole lot to be honest…

And boom. Someone grabbed the Idea Stick and beat the shit out of me right then and there.

Whereas actionable intelligence is shit we can actually use and apply, I, and the multitude of others like me, have a metric fuck-ton of in-actionable intelligence, because thanks high school and thanks college.

In-actionable Intelligencenoun; Information that the average person will never ever need outside of high school and college, but gets shoved the fuck down our throats anyway, taking up time and funding from learning actual applicable life skills.

Examples: The mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell, imaginary numbers (sqrt(-1)), anything to do with history that isn’t within the last 200 years, etc.

Basically, it’s a relatable way of saying “I’ve got no idea what the fuck I’m doing, or saying, but hey. Your still here reading everything I write, so I must be doing something right.”



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s